That Whore Named Fate Part Two

When I watched "The Butterfly Effect" seven years ago, I remember that I felt goosebumps all over my skin.  The whole debate of "free will versus fate" now had a new meaning in my mind. The movie didn't fare too well at the box office but the plot had a deep meaning for me. Evan Treborn (played by Ashton Kutcher) is a psychology major and experiences blackouts and lapses in his memory. He discovers that by reading his old journals, he can go back in time. Having had a traumatic childhood, Evan tries to change the past. But he realizes that every little action he makes has a multitude of unintended consequences. For me, this theory holds that sometimes you need to stop playing God. This is funny since despite my family's religious affiliations and this solid unflinching belief in "predestination," I've never been much of a believeing in "fate and its merciless power" person. I have always been more of the free will person who believes that "we" have the power to shape our own destinies. However, watching this movie and of course, my own life events convinced me that there are powers that are beyond our control and there are some things which we have absolutely no control over.

Each time that Evan time travels and tries to fix things, he ends up screwing them over even more. The love of his life becomes a hooker at one point due to him constantly trying to create a happy ending and changing the past. The main point is that first of all, there is no such thing as happiness. As Julian from One Tree Hill talks about happiness, he describes how it's not a destination but only a state or a condition. You cannot reach a place called happiness because it doesn't exist. As Ellen Hopkins aptly puts it:

"Happiness, you see, it's just an illusion of fate; a heavenly sleight designed to make you believe in fairy tales. You'll only find happy endings in books. Some books."

The point is that you cannot play God. So you just need to stop pretending that everything is under your control at times and just breathe and relax and let life play itself out. For people like me unfortunately, this brutal reality of not being able to control or shape your own destiny is very hard to swallow.

On a positive note, check out the video below if you want to see "The Butterfly Effect," in a positive light:
http://play.simpletruths.com/movie/the-butterfly-effect/

That Whore Named Fate!

Have you ever felt completely and hopelessly powerless? Sometimes there are strong currents that are constantly enveloping you, twisting and turning your body and it hurts like hell. The pain makes you scream in constant agony but there is absolutely nothing you can do about it. You are helpless. The waves and currents are drowning you and you try so hard to swim and untangle yourself from their merciless grasp; but it is an utter impossibility. The more you fight, the more there is a danger of destroying yourself in the process as well as others around you. What do you do when this wretched bitch called fate threatens to shatter you entirely? People say there is no such thing as "fate." It is merely an illusion. But if there really isn't anything known as fate and everything is always under your control, then how come there are times when you feel utterly helpless? There are times when things are just not in your control and you just helplessly watch the tide of life overpower you and all you do is hope against hope that your floating body in the ocean will find its way through and that you shall survive.

These are times when you just need to stop writhing and fighting. You need to accept the circumstances. No matter how much you hate those circumstances. Whether you're an atheist, an agnostic, a spiritual person or a devout religious person who has faith...sometimes the best path is to accept that there is a higher power out there who will take care of all things. Just go with the flow. And accept the circumstances no matter how gruesome they may be. If you can't fight and win, then there is no point in waging the battle. Just move on. Jennifer Salaiz summed it up perfectly when she said:

 "I was in the biggest breakdown of my life when I stopped crying long enough to let the words of my epiphany really sink in. That whore, karma (delete the word karma and instead, insert "fate.") had finally made her way around and had bitch slapped me right across the face. The realization only made me cry harder."

A quote from Lemony Snickets stands out in my mind: "Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like."

During times when I feel this nagging despair and dejection wrapping its ugly, smelly, disgusting black cloak around me, I decide to look at things positively. This was meant to be and whatever is meant to be shall always find it's way (as another famous quote goes). I think of "A View from the Bridge" by Arthur Miller and I'm reminded of how the lawyer, Alfieri, who acts as a mediator in this tragic play watched the events of "fate" run its "bloody course." Powerless and helpless, he was unable to stop Eddie Carbone from bringing about his own destruction. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Miller's tragic play, AVFTB, here is a short summary. Eddie Carbone is the uncle of the beautiful and innocent, Catherine, who wants Eddie to stop being so overprotective of her and yearns for her independence. Enter Rodolpho. He captures Catherine's heart and this fuels Eddie's jealousy. Eddie is secretly in love with his niece (she is not his niece by blood mind you, so his desires are technically not incestuous). Eddie's wife, Beatrice, watches Eddie's passion and the events of the play with a helpless horror. She is unable to do anything about it and that's exactly how I feel at times. Eddie dies tragically in the end due to his inability to keep his passionate and impulsive nature under control.

Many would argue that in AVFTB, fate was not as important as Eddie's actions. If Eddie had been less impulsive, passionate and kept his unconscious and somewhat "incestuous" desires for Catherine under control, then he would not have met such a tragic end. Even so, sometimes no matter what you do, things always happen and you cannot control them. That is why you sometimes need to let go and be content with what you have. Or sometimes you need to settle for half, which Alfieri claims is the better option.

So even though at times, fighting seems like the better option, you need to accept the fact that you cannot win. Eddie did not win and died fighting and Alfieri considers his courage laudable. But if you want to live and survive, then you need to settle for half as the lawyer aptly quotes:

"Most of the time we settle for half and I like it better. Even as I know how wrong he was, and his death useless, I tremble, for I confess that something perversely pure calls to me from his memory--not purely good, but himself purely And yet, it is better to settle for half, it must be! And so I mourn him--I admit it--with a certain alarm."

(To be continued...)